When Needed, Get Help!!

I’m not really sure what made me want to post today. This whole blog thing has been a fail on my part. Not because I don’t like it, I really do. Before this site I used to blog more often. At first I thought blogging was all about numbers. How many views, how many followers, etc. Then I came to realize it really wasn’t. It was like I was talking to myself, and I even came to decisions just but thinking something out it a post. Must have seemed crazy at times. I’m sure it literally looked like I was talking to myself LOL! But once it shut down I fell away from it for a while and then looked here to maybe pick back up. Whatever it is blocking my blogging path, I hope it diminishes soon. For now I guess I am just going to try to make it work as well as I can. I babble a lot, so if anyone is reading this I sincerely apologize.

So, the past couple months I have been struggling big time with figure out my classes. I have three online classes…. that suck, but I have to take them because that is the only way they are offered. I have terrible time management issues and online classes bring that out the worst in me. I recently forgot a deadline that was a huge deal and decided I needed to talk to a few people. So after talking to a few professors, my coach, and an advisor, I believe I am going to be okay.

The truth is I should have gotten help sooner. I knew the issues I was having with classes and instead of getting help I got frustrated and pushed things off. Well that went well, now in one of my classes the highest grade I can receive is a B. That’s not terrible but the fact is that I have to get all A’s for that to be accomplished so now I have to work extra hard.

My coach put me in contact with someone who is helping me with my time management issues. We had a meeting today and now I have schedule days and times that I have to study which is probably a good thing. I thought that studying at home would be fine since for the majority of time being there I would be alone but there are so many distractions. Food, television, that book that is misplaced, the pictures that I still need to hang up, the clothes I need to fold and put away…. point is there are way to many distractions for me. Having a small cubicle of an area to study might just be what I need to keep me on task. She gave me a weekly calendar that has what times I have open each day of the week. Main purpose to find time to mark of as study time.

I have never been so frustrated with myself. Okay I take that back, I haven’t been so frustrated with myself in terms of school related issues. Finally talking with people about my issue was definitely what is helping me get out of this mess I made. Sometimes the help you need is staring you in the face and all you need to do is ask and BOOM life just got a little easier. There are so many things causing stress in my life right now. Wrestling this time management issue is definitely going to lighten the load. Even if just a small portion.

My advice, when you need help ask. No matter how small or big. SOMEONE will be able to help. Just have to find the right people. They are there with open arms ready to assist.

Gosh darn life!!!!

First and foremost I would like to say help!!!

I have not been on in a while. Quite depressing but I’m back. Had a lot going on starting last Friday and driving all the way up to now. If you don’t want to hear about the current struggles I am facing then I invite you to click away now cause it starts in

3….

2….

1….

Now!!!!

Okay so lets start with Friday. I left for a gun show and while setting up I got a call from my mom that our cousin had passed away. It wasn’t sudden she had been having many problems with seizures and strokes and after having more than multiple strokes and just wasn’t able to hold on any longer. She was really close to us so that was hard news to take.

Then comes the part when I can actually smile and say something good has happened. During this show I got to spend some time with a guy I like and we’ve gotten a lot closer since then. Thankfully he is helping me through the slump right now and has been very understanding so that is amazing.

Sunday night I was walking around in the dark and noticed that I was not seeing correctly so after about 5 minutes of trying to figure out why I felt so weird and why I couldn’t see right I realized that my vision blurs out on the left side. The strange thing is this only happens in the dark. I wasn’t concerned at first but it keeps happening so now Im getting a little worried. So if anyone knows of anything this could be that be great. If not, my dad is forcing me to go see a doctor which leads me to my next part.

Monday my gma wanted to go to the store so as we were going I lost power steering and my battery light starting dinging at me so I took it to a shop which then they told me that I have multiple wears in my van and bolts lose that are making my belt pop off which obviously is not good but making it worse to do the repairs they said I needed I would have to be rich…. lol I am hoping I can just buy the parts I need and have someone do it, no worries the place that would do it knows what they are doing they just require buying the parts yourself. But I was told that  it would cut down on the cost possibly more than half. So good news in a flood of misery.

Tuesday I had soccer training and by the end of it breathing was so hard I couldn’t move for a while. Now I would go out and say that it’s just because I’m not in as good of shape as I was earlier but that’s false and I was breathing fine at practice this morning. The problem has only been occurring when I’m in cold air so my trainer recommending having my doctor check it out.

Might as well continue into yesterday. It was actually not a bad day but one of the girls on my team was in a car accident and that was pretty bad. She’s already been having problems and now after the accident she’s in even more pain than before so I’m a little concerned about her. She’s doing okay but you can tell that she is in a lot of pain.

Today I had practice super early, woke up at 5 this morning. No problem though. Once I took my shower I was wide awake. During the workout I felt something not right with my arm and for the majority of the day it has been bothering me so I went to the trainer and she said I did something to something to my tricep, which I guess according to her is really hard to do so that sucks. I can’t put much weight on it. Holding my head on my hand is out of the question and I can’t lift my arm over my head or even bend it without pain so that’s just awesome.

Then later today my card was declined and when I checked out my account realized that I had forgot to cancel a subscription that I don’t want anymore. What’s terrible about this is I needed the money that they took from my account to pay for my meds, my car, doc apptment, and soccer stuff. I sent them an email hoping that they will be understanding, which so far dealing with them they have been so hopefully they can help me out. Adding to soccer, I have practice in the morning and now my gma is upset because she swears I didn’t tell her I  couldn’t take her to work in the morning. I thought I told her but my memory is bad so she could very well be right. I feel bad but she said she has some personal days that she needs to use so I guess that’ll be fine.

So that leads up to now. After the most eventful week I’ve had in a long time I actually have time to relax and enjoy releasing some of my frustration. Just putting all this out here doesn’t not solve much but it definitely just relaxed me a bit more.  

I guess the way I see these events is that things could be worse…. it’s hard to see it sometimes but it’s true. There’s someone out there with problems that would make mine seem miniscule. Everything that has been going on definitely have me super stressed and when you add school work on top of that it adds to my anxiety. I just feel like punching a wall right now. Probably would mess up my arm even more but man it’s so tempting looking on everything going on. I might be at a rough spot right now but I’ll get through it. Stuff happens but we gotta keep going right. Life is a crazy ride but it’s one worth getting on. The typing is starting to get to me and is making my arm really sore so I guess I shall hit publish post and be done for the night.

See you soon. I will have free time now that I have a free weekend to get caught up on everything, thank goodness!!

Memory and Organization Problems

With the new semester beginning next week I’ve been doing a lot of small things to get ready for the semester. It seems that every time I start I begin organized and ready to go and it all falls apart after the first or second week. I’ve got to keep my grades up and get them even higher if I want to reach my goals. I’m not sure what goes wrong but it hasn’t failed to happen yet. This semester I want to make a change to stay organized in all my classes and make this the best semester I’ve ever had. One of the biggest problems I’ve noticed is remembering deadlines. I’ve tried keeping a planner and that has not helped in fact its added to what I have to remember which makes it even more difficult for me. If anyone has any input on what I could try I am up for any suggestions. I recently got a whiteboard calendar hoping that it will help me at least a small amount in remember things. One other thing I have tried is putting deadlines in my phone but even then I find that it does not help or I forget to put it down all together. I’m running out of ideas. It’s getting really bad and since my concussion at the beginning of the school year its been that much harder. However this problem started long before my concussion. Forgetting stuff doesn’t just affect school but it is the most important thing to me that it is affecting. I’ve heard stuff about memory training, maybe I should look into that. Wouldn’t hurt anything I guess. I’ve got to do something that’s for sure.